When I was a new seminarian, I experienced so much anxiety every day. Later on, I realized that much of my feelings of anxiety were caused by my need for control, and ultimately because of my non-dependence on God. I worried too much that I forgot to enjoy the daily surprises of God in our seminary formation. All that I saw and recognized were the struggles and how to manage the tasks given to me. I had to make sure that I did everything; but the human formation programs of the seminary made me realize that there is something more to the tasks—that is, to grow in faith and trust in God. I learned to accept that there is no need to worry because God cannot be outdone in generosity. He is generous enough that whatever I was able to finish during the day, He is there to supply for what is lacking. God forms my heart to always depend on Him. After all, everything is God’s grace.
As I progressed in my formation, I still give my whole self and do everything that I can in my personal capacity but I now learn to abandon myself to God’s providence. I do not have to worry about the things that, in the first place, I cannot control. Essentially, everything depends on God. His will for me to continue with my formation, coupled with my ardent desire to persevere for this vocation, challenges me to just live in the present moment. I do not need to worry about my own life; God has already planned it for me. I do not need to worry about material things; God has given me the opportunity to grow in spiritual things while I am being formed in the seminary. My thirst for Him is satisfied whenever I receive Him in the sacrament.
The Gospel assures us that God is in charge of everything. As we live through our day, everything is already planned by God. The blessings and learnings we receive are all from God.
By: Sem. Keith R. Buenaventura
Jesus said to his disciples:
“No one can serve two masters.
He will either hate one and love the other,
or be devoted to one and despise the other.
You cannot serve God and mammon.
“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life,
what you will eat or drink,
or about your body, what you will wear.
Is not life more than food and the body more than clothing?
Look at the birds in the sky;
they do not sow or reap, they gather nothing into barns,
yet your heavenly Father feeds them.
Are not you more important than they?
Can any of you by worrying add a single moment to your life-span?
Why are you anxious about clothes?
Learn from the way the wild flowers grow.
They do not work or spin.
But I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor
was clothed like one of them.
If God so clothes the grass of the field,
which grows today and is thrown into the oven tomorrow,
will he not much more provide for you, O you of little faith?
So do not worry and say, ‘What are we to eat?’
or ‘What are we to drink?’ or ‘What are we to wear?’
All these things the pagans seek.
Your heavenly Father knows that you need them all.
But seek first the Kingdom of God and his righteousness,
and all these things will be given you besides.
Do not worry about tomorrow; tomorrow will take care of itself.
Sufficient for a day is its own evil.”